Now I don’t know if you recognize this person. They are maybe around you. But you don’t feel what I feel. It can’t be described. You can only see it.
I’m talking about that person who changed your life just like that, no warning, just a simple handshake. Okay I lied, there was one thing that I’ve never felt before. But I’m gonna talk about that later.
This the one who showed me that the flaw in my code is something unique. Something not worth hiding or be ashamed of just because not everyone is the same.
Let’s reverse time for a little bit.
Yes, the 14 years old me. Tho was destroyed by the DNA who started making a little changes in his life so he can be happy, little did I know that was going to create my biggest demon.
Something happened so I had to move and that was the worst and the best part of my life.
Getting ready for the new school year thinking it’s gonna be the same crap as always. Getting the text from at the moment “friends” saying: “We are waiting for you.”
Take a deep breath and go. Having fun laughing and talking about pointless stuff.
Someone screamed our names. I saw in the distance one familiar face and another one that I’ve never seen before. The unknown was the new girl. Going to introduce myself. Thinking do “I gave to go for a handshake or a hug? Let’s do a handshake” I grabbed her hand with a smile.
That was the moment that I was talking about. The moment when you feel something new, something you’ve never felt before. It’s like I finally found the missing piece of me. Everything around stopped for a couple of seconds. I kept staring at her. She was making me feel whole for the first time in my life.
A week goes by I started texting her. After 11 weeks I told her something that nobody knew about me and the big massive mountain disappeared from my back.
Her voice is so clear. And her smile, man her smile is everything. Her touch is cold but her heart is made of gold.
If you quit you loose. The walls are made of leyers of ice. Leyers of stores. Leyers of fights. My fists ware breeding trying the break the ice.
3 years later I lost, I was alone now. Thinking okay it’s not worth it, but who I’m without her? I dont want to cry anymore. I don’t want to feel. Started playing this “I’m fine” role. Till I’ve had enough. I wasn’t myself. It was a time to move on. Did that, I was close to happy but the piece was just gone as the other part of me.
I couldn’t live like that. I had to continue the fight or fail forever.
After 1 year I finally broke the ice. I saw her fears, she is unknown. She is cold for ones, fire to another, but everything for me. She is the emotion running trough my bones.
You are there when I get lost up in the clouds, you are my gravity.
After a year someone had to create his path. She was the one who was always saying “Now or never”. I remember my last day with her, thinking what’s gonna happen, if we will be the same or if we will be together again. Running under the street lights no fears no responsibilities. Just 2 lost kids who found each other. It was last moment that I felt truly happy. I’m the moon, you are the sun, I can’t seem to shine now that you’re gone.
You could say that I’ve had a couple good days, but nobody’s eyes shine quite the same way